I need to survive for 3 days without pooping, and eating as little as possible. I can pee, but not very often. It can’t take up too much space. What food do I pack?
Please don’t ask why I need this.
It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.
It has to be something I can easily find.
EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:
I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.
I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.
I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.
I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).
Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.
If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.
Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.
I always find people who use this “I’ll let x decide” shtick as complete utter morons.
Here’s the thing: God already decided. He decided to give you laxatives so you can sort out your own bowel movements. God literally doesn’t have time for your shit.
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God gives his hardest battles (taking a shit) to his toughest soldiers (me).
I need to survive for 3 days without pooping, and eating as little as possible. I can pee, but not very often. It can’t take up too much space. What food do I pack?
Please don’t ask why I need this.
It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.
It has to be something I can easily find.
EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:
I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.
I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.
I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.
I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).
Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.
If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.
Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.
Why does it have to be food? Why not just take a bunch of Imodium?
Good old fashioned army rations will bung that hole right up! You’ll be shitting a great redwood by the time you get home.
The only thing that topped army ration packs for me was a week of hospital food while receiving copious amounts of IV morphine.
That was like an early transatlantic cable…
So THAT’S the bullshit everyone got so worked up about? Very anticlimactic if you ask me 🫤
I always find people who use this “I’ll let x decide” shtick as complete utter morons.
Here’s the thing: God already decided. He decided to give you laxatives so you can sort out your own bowel movements. God literally doesn’t have time for your shit.
This brings new meaning to the phrase, “Faith without works is dead.”