I’m not a doctor at all but something like this makes me wonder about OCD. Do you have other intrusive thoughts that are hard to shake?

Yes, it’s true the few things I have habits for are the ones I can do pretty consistently, not 100% of course, and sometimes I get the feeling after I already walked out the door and have to go back and check lol. I do agree that habits and schedules and stuff can be really good for people with adhd but they are also really difficult to self- impose. I used to have a sticky note posted in my house somewhere prominent to remind me of some things I should do every day, like drink water, but eventually it gets moved or passed over or I’m in a hurry a few days in a row and it’s gone. I’m not trying to be defeatist, I know there are strategies to help, and I appreciate any and all advice, as I’m definitely in need of some changes.

I struggle with doing anything beyond the bare necessities to get out the door in the morning before work, cause night person in a day world. But I do have the very brisk morning walks when I’m running a few minutes late (often). At work I have extrinsic motivation so that’s usually fine, but doing things to take care of my life self and growth after work I am often pretty useless. Do you think trying to get dopamine up again after work?

Often it’s most efficient for me to to just slide right into chores when I get home without losing my work vibe/fast state, but it’s tiring, and tends to push eating and drinking down the priority list even further… I feel just poorly balanced in general. But I’m not medicated or even properly diagnosed, just strongly suspected and waiting for my assessment in the next few months.

But it depresses me that I feel too overwhelmed by just the basic requirements of life to really focus on things I actually care about. I want to develop my hobbies deeper and learn new skills, not just manage to tread water forever, and I’m not even really even doing that. I do a decent job at work but my home is often a disaster. Keeping myself interested in any one hobby is a barrier too but not as a big as the pitifully low limit to my capacity to do things…

My problem is more the actual motivation (executive dysfunction really) than memory, I can usually look back at what I was doing enough to pick it back up later. I try to add things to a notepad on my phone when I remember it exists and I should do it, but having things written down doesn’t seem to have a ton of impact on whether or not it will be completed. I don’t really understand how this helps you get the motivation to actually do these things, but it probably depends on what it is we each struggle with. How does memory keep you motivated? By reminding you of why you care about doing something maybe?

Free tier is homeless.

But if you really grind you can do a decent off-grid build, it’s fun to play but still going to be a free tier experience of course.