My old person trait is when someone tells me what they mean, they better damn well be telling me what they mean, because I’m not gonna play mind games with them. If you tell me you’re not upset then I’ll believe you’re not upset, I’m honouring you and your words and trusting that you’re being upfront and honest with what you want me to know. And if you secretly are upset, it’s not my responsibility to know that, you did not tell me.
Personally I’m not great at reading people and I’ve found they get even more frustrated when you get it wrong than when you just don’t do it. After a certain point I found myself miserable and I kinda stopped and went “wait, why is it MY job to know what THEY want from me?” And I eventually just kinda. Stopped. Most people hardly noticed because I got it wrong or overlooked it so much anyway but it was tons less stress on me, and now they knew how to effectively interact with me
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My old person trait is when someone tells me what they mean, they better damn well be telling me what they mean, because I’m not gonna play mind games with them. If you tell me you’re not upset then I’ll believe you’re not upset, I’m honouring you and your words and trusting that you’re being upfront and honest with what you want me to know. And if you secretly are upset, it’s not my responsibility to know that, you did not tell me.
I have adapted this policy. With a bunch of trying to understand why this person is acting a certain way.
Personally I’m not great at reading people and I’ve found they get even more frustrated when you get it wrong than when you just don’t do it. After a certain point I found myself miserable and I kinda stopped and went “wait, why is it MY job to know what THEY want from me?” And I eventually just kinda. Stopped. Most people hardly noticed because I got it wrong or overlooked it so much anyway but it was tons less stress on me, and now they knew how to effectively interact with me