how do I deal with it? awfully lol

what can help though is increasing your sens of self-efficacy. the belief that you can do/change something.

and it can be anything, really. read a page in a book if you atruggle with that. make something with your hands. beat that stupid boss in elden ring. doesnt matter, as long as you can finish it.

tiny steps. dont try to read the whole book

you can do a lot with therapy alone supposedly, but not sure havent tried that yet

do you have adhd?