I just feel like I’m intruding on a private moment and just sit there tense and embarrassed until it’s over. Trying not to listen to the schlorp schlorp noises.
But it’s such a common trope, I so assume I’m in some weird minority.
Does anyone find it enjoyable to watch? If so, why and how?
Nah I actually kind of hate them, though maybe it’s just my childlike lust for extreme violence. Sex scenes I’ve never really gotten either, I’d rather see something like, a building collapse or an oil rig explode?
I haaaate this shit, and have since I was a kid. I actually recently had a discussion with my gf (both of us in our 30s) along these lines, though I more specifically asked her if she could think of a scene in any media in which the story just absolutely could not move forward without one of those stupid, bawdy, explicit sex scenes, and neither of us could think of one.
Savage Grace used its sex scene’s extremely well. A lot like the other reply about Shortbus, the sexuality is at the front and center of the film’s plot. PS: there should be a bit of a trigger warning as there’s a strong element of parental sexual abuse and this movie gets fucked up
I just don’t see how actually showing me a character’s genitals serves any more of a purpose than perhaps tastefully implying (through cutaways, for example) that the characters are having sex other than pure titillation… And there is clearly a vast sea of content designed specifically for that, so I don’t really care for media that goes out of its way to be graphic if that isn’t its express purpose.
Additionally, to be perfectly honest, I don’t really know how anyone can view a lot of these sex scenes in a positive light post-#metoo movement either. Maybe I’m just an idiot or a prude or something, but I have a lot of difficulty believing that every single nude/sex scene that’s come out of Hollywood has been completely free of some variety of impropriety or, at the very least, coercion. And that by itself is enough to strip away whatever merit you might argue the scene could have.
On-screen kissing doesn’t bother me, just don’t like the ones that seemed forced or are cheesy.
Racked my mind for good examples, and came up with Tobey Spider-Man kissing Mary Jane upside down in the rain and Jack and Rose’s first kiss on the deck of the Titanic.
Shortbus, maybe? The whole film is about becoming more sexually aware. No idea if it’s any good, though. My research into the matter was only so thorough…
I do, but only if it’s built up properly. This is also true of musical numbers and fight scenes. If built up properly, they can be incredibly cathartic and the best parts of the film, but if not, they grind the plot to a halt.
The reason so many people hate these kinds of scenes is that most screenwriters are really bad at creating tension. The purpose of these scenes is to release emotional tension, so without building this, they feel pointless and jarring. The best parody of this is in Men in Tights when Robin bursts into a love song out of nowhere and it scares the hell out of Marian.
I’m trying to provide examples of love scenes I actually like in films, and to be honest, I’m coming up blank. I think it may just be a lot more difficult to generate romantic tension in the average timespan of a film. It’s easier in television, where you get more time to tell the story. I think my favorite intimate scene in tv is in Game of Thrones season 3 when John and Ygritte are in the cave.
Wesley and Buttercup would be a good example. Or maybe I’m remembering it with rose glasses as the kiss itself was narrated by Columbo and Kevin Arnold didn’t mind.
Last of the Mohicans homie; there are a few scenes in that one that scorch AND add to the story. It’s like it’s giving you the reason for fighting an unwinnable battle.
No, but I see why people would like them. I personally don’t like them because I feel like it’s almost always an unnecessarily long scene to begin with. If it’s more than 10 seconds, it just feels like it’s meant to make people horny.
I feel exactly the same, also about sex scenes (unless I’m watching porn of course). I don’t like being a peeping tom and those scenes usually feel like lazy fillers getting in the way of the story.
Ahha yes. They also fill another need, although not to the movie’s benefit: It shows off the actors toned and chiseled bodies, advertising them for future roles.
I really don’t understand how you can watch hardcore porn and then feel uncomfortable with kissing or sex scenes in movies. I can understand being bored by them, but I really don’t get how someone who watches hardcore porn could be made uncomfortable by kissing and sex in a movie.
Weirdly, it seems like porn has made people more prudish.
Not prudish, I don’t mind people kissing (or fucking) but I don’t feel like watching them directly.
Regarding porn: yes, it’s weird. Maybe it’s explained by being horny or not. There are studies that horniness makes you less affected by disgust. Maybe this is related.
I can get that. Porn is very explicitly made with the audience in mind, and exhibitionist in nature. It would naturally feel less like intruding on someone’s personal moment of beauty if they are like “hey guys we’re fuckin’ for you!”
Wonder if this depends on if other people are around.
One difference is normal such scenes are often in the second half of movies or sometimes even seasons into a show. So there’s much more emotional connection to the characters and the setting is often much more private. Where with porn, often its quite quick to the sex with little good character development and you know going in that the point is to watch them have sex. Like, going to an orgy could be normal for someone, but like that doesn’t mean they’d feel comfortable hiding in their roommate’s closet and secretly watching them have sex.
Because with porn you’re watching it, alone or with a partner, for a specific purpose. When I’m watching a regular movie I don’t want to sit next to my brother or my mom and watch that. Even if I’m alone I don’t want to get all hot and bothered and then it’s like, do I pause for a minute and go deal with it or sit and watch a car chase like this? Just imply it and cut to the next morning or something. Only time I’m cool with it is watching with the spouse.
I’m ok with them. What really bores me in movies are the fighting scenes near the end of the movie, when they encounter the bad guys. They share fists in each other’s faces for a good 10 minutes until one of them decides to go down. I usually skip forward. 1 minute fight scenes should be enough.
I always feel like I’m in the minority when it comes to action sequences. They are 80% of the time the most boring part of a movie. Plot and character development don’t happen during them, and usually (especially for the big climactic fight scene) the outcome is certain.
For me, the only exceptions are generally:
Fights that the heroes might actually lose. (So usually, the fights earlier in the show)
Fights where there are good character moments or development during it. (The Princess Bride sword fight scene is a classic for this)
Fights with lots of good strategy/tactics in them. (Game of Thrones had a lot of this, at least prior to the last season)
There are a very few fight scenes I’ll actually enjoy outside of these ones, and it feels like many action movies don’t bother with any of this.
I feel similar about car chase sequences. There are occasionally creative or interesting moments in them but for the most part they are like you said, the outcome is certain and they feel like filler that for some reason every action movie needs to have.
They also rarely make sense, with high end sports cars struggling to outmaneuver big trucks, and motorcycles somehow managing to be any kind of threat to the main characters vehicle.
I don’t think any of these movies care at all about physics. They also have girls fighting as if they were twice their weight and power, kicking much bigger guys across the room. It’s silly.
Physical gender differences exist even in this crazy age of 2023 where people get upset for mentioning them.
Agree on fight scenes. They are only interesting if they have uncertainty or show some clever and competent fighting. Any fight scene where the bad guy picks up his opponent and instead of strangling him to death just throw him a few meters away and goes “raah!” should just be edited out in its entirety.
Years ago I realized despite liking shows with lots of fights, often those were the parts I paid the least attention to. Think I like the genre because of the built-in breaks for my attention. But I’m also the type who was annoyed when my roommates paid for ad-free service on our livingroom TV because I preferred having them for the purpose of breaks.
How about movies like Fast and the Furious where every single fight scene is ridiculous? They really don’t care about realism in those movies. I watch like 10 minutes and then I turn it off because it’s like watching a computer animation.
You are watching a computer animation. It’s all digital effects and animation. Hell even the actors are digitally recreated sometimes, making it fully digital effects
At least that scene is funny and develops the plot. I think they’re talking more about stuff like all those 90s movies that have the plot grind to a halt so two characters can punch each other for ten minutes.
check the fight scenes in Kung Fu Hustle (Crazy Kung-Fu). I don’t like fight films so it was a challenge from a friend to watch this together. I ended up loving it.
Fight scenes in Everything Everywhere All at Once or Survive Style 5+ too were really fun.
Sometimes there is VICARIOUS pleasure to be had - I never noticed ‘schlorp schlorp’ noises.
There’s a lot of truth in the adage that ‘sex sells’. To imagine yourself being in the position of the person on screen is rather a guilty pleasure, enabling you to take part in ‘consentual sex’ with someone by simply imagining that you are the one doing the act.
I consider them part of normal human behavior and therefore natural in movies. If anything I might think more intimacy should be portrayed on screen. But this question and many of the replies let me see that I am not necessarily typical in my view that sex, love, and kissing are no big deal in media.
Going to the bathroom and sleeping are also normal human behavior, but I’m still not gonna watch a show or movie that shows someone spending 10 minutes on the toilet. Not because I think its gross , but just boring imo. But given I consider myself aroace-spec, I don’t expect my experience to necessarily be representative. And I think those things should be considered more normal in every-day life, rather than something that needs to be hidden, so normalizing it in media is probably a step forward.
Since you mentioned “boring” — Probably the most out of step thing about me is that I think boredom is healthy. I think constantly stimulating stories (and consumption habits, relationships, news…) are interfering with the hard, slow work of sustainable existence. (I just realized I’m almost quoting Dr. Wong! Sorry lol)
I crave entertainment and distraction. And I admit my huge flaw of falling into a lecturing tone. Sigh. I don’t mean it. I only want to control me. It’s just that for most of my life I’ve been pretty unhappy and dysfunctional & I see links between my past state and a desire for escape and constant entertainment. Is this still about kissing in movies? Maybe. We are just sharing opinions on the internet. Getting feelings out is good.
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Nah I actually kind of hate them, though maybe it’s just my childlike lust for extreme violence. Sex scenes I’ve never really gotten either, I’d rather see something like, a building collapse or an oil rig explode?
My partner is asexual and hates these scenes.
Being very much not asexual, I too hate these scenes.
Your partner is an amoeba?
What’s better than feeling like the creep just watching while two people make out?
It’s the wet sloppy mouth sounds they throw in on top of the kissing scenes that drives me up the fucking wall
One time they should just throw in the sound of someone drinking jelly with a straw and see if anyone notice.
Oh man, you’d love this one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PEfNeUdq_C0
It’s the wet sloppy mouth sounds they throw in on top of the kissing scenes that drives me up the fucking wall
I haaaate this shit, and have since I was a kid. I actually recently had a discussion with my gf (both of us in our 30s) along these lines, though I more specifically asked her if she could think of a scene in any media in which the story just absolutely could not move forward without one of those stupid, bawdy, explicit sex scenes, and neither of us could think of one.
Savage Grace used its sex scene’s extremely well. A lot like the other reply about Shortbus, the sexuality is at the front and center of the film’s plot. PS: there should be a bit of a trigger warning as there’s a strong element of parental sexual abuse and this movie gets fucked up
Well, movies that are all about people seeking sex somehow need those scenes. American Pie and The 40-Year-Old Virgin for example.
The sex scene in Zach and Mirri Make a Porno between the two main characters highlights that they actually love each other.
I just don’t see how actually showing me a character’s genitals serves any more of a purpose than perhaps tastefully implying (through cutaways, for example) that the characters are having sex other than pure titillation… And there is clearly a vast sea of content designed specifically for that, so I don’t really care for media that goes out of its way to be graphic if that isn’t its express purpose.
Additionally, to be perfectly honest, I don’t really know how anyone can view a lot of these sex scenes in a positive light post-#metoo movement either. Maybe I’m just an idiot or a prude or something, but I have a lot of difficulty believing that every single nude/sex scene that’s come out of Hollywood has been completely free of some variety of impropriety or, at the very least, coercion. And that by itself is enough to strip away whatever merit you might argue the scene could have.
On-screen kissing doesn’t bother me, just don’t like the ones that seemed forced or are cheesy.
Racked my mind for good examples, and came up with Tobey Spider-Man kissing Mary Jane upside down in the rain and Jack and Rose’s first kiss on the deck of the Titanic.
Shortbus, maybe? The whole film is about becoming more sexually aware. No idea if it’s any good, though. My research into the matter was only so thorough…
I do, but only if it’s built up properly. This is also true of musical numbers and fight scenes. If built up properly, they can be incredibly cathartic and the best parts of the film, but if not, they grind the plot to a halt.
The reason so many people hate these kinds of scenes is that most screenwriters are really bad at creating tension. The purpose of these scenes is to release emotional tension, so without building this, they feel pointless and jarring. The best parody of this is in Men in Tights when Robin bursts into a love song out of nowhere and it scares the hell out of Marian.
I’m trying to provide examples of love scenes I actually like in films, and to be honest, I’m coming up blank. I think it may just be a lot more difficult to generate romantic tension in the average timespan of a film. It’s easier in television, where you get more time to tell the story. I think my favorite intimate scene in tv is in Game of Thrones season 3 when John and Ygritte are in the cave.
Wesley and Buttercup would be a good example. Or maybe I’m remembering it with rose glasses as the kiss itself was narrated by Columbo and Kevin Arnold didn’t mind.
Last of the Mohicans homie; there are a few scenes in that one that scorch AND add to the story. It’s like it’s giving you the reason for fighting an unwinnable battle.
There ya go! I knew there had to be a couple out there!
There ya go! I knew there had to be a couple out there!
No, but I see why people would like them. I personally don’t like them because I feel like it’s almost always an unnecessarily long scene to begin with. If it’s more than 10 seconds, it just feels like it’s meant to make people horny.
I feel exactly the same, also about sex scenes (unless I’m watching porn of course). I don’t like being a peeping tom and those scenes usually feel like lazy fillers getting in the way of the story.
Ahha yes. They also fill another need, although not to the movie’s benefit: It shows off the actors toned and chiseled bodies, advertising them for future roles.
I really don’t understand how you can watch hardcore porn and then feel uncomfortable with kissing or sex scenes in movies. I can understand being bored by them, but I really don’t get how someone who watches hardcore porn could be made uncomfortable by kissing and sex in a movie.
Weirdly, it seems like porn has made people more prudish.
Not prudish, I don’t mind people kissing (or fucking) but I don’t feel like watching them directly.
Regarding porn: yes, it’s weird. Maybe it’s explained by being horny or not. There are studies that horniness makes you less affected by disgust. Maybe this is related.
I can get that. Porn is very explicitly made with the audience in mind, and exhibitionist in nature. It would naturally feel less like intruding on someone’s personal moment of beauty if they are like “hey guys we’re fuckin’ for you!”
Wonder if this depends on if other people are around.
One difference is normal such scenes are often in the second half of movies or sometimes even seasons into a show. So there’s much more emotional connection to the characters and the setting is often much more private. Where with porn, often its quite quick to the sex with little good character development and you know going in that the point is to watch them have sex. Like, going to an orgy could be normal for someone, but like that doesn’t mean they’d feel comfortable hiding in their roommate’s closet and secretly watching them have sex.
Because with porn you’re watching it, alone or with a partner, for a specific purpose. When I’m watching a regular movie I don’t want to sit next to my brother or my mom and watch that. Even if I’m alone I don’t want to get all hot and bothered and then it’s like, do I pause for a minute and go deal with it or sit and watch a car chase like this? Just imply it and cut to the next morning or something. Only time I’m cool with it is watching with the spouse.
Makes me feel awkward
I’m fine with them, except for this one
What the pedophile fuck…
Why you gotta do Blank Check dirty like that 😭
Looks like Blank Check did itself dirty!
Jesus Christ that is uncomfortable. How did that make it through to the final cut of the movie? Gross.
Dude, you’re killing me. Best description of kissing noises ever!
I’m ok with them. What really bores me in movies are the fighting scenes near the end of the movie, when they encounter the bad guys. They share fists in each other’s faces for a good 10 minutes until one of them decides to go down. I usually skip forward. 1 minute fight scenes should be enough.
I always feel like I’m in the minority when it comes to action sequences. They are 80% of the time the most boring part of a movie. Plot and character development don’t happen during them, and usually (especially for the big climactic fight scene) the outcome is certain.
For me, the only exceptions are generally:
Fights that the heroes might actually lose. (So usually, the fights earlier in the show)
Fights where there are good character moments or development during it. (The Princess Bride sword fight scene is a classic for this)
Fights with lots of good strategy/tactics in them. (Game of Thrones had a lot of this, at least prior to the last season)
There are a very few fight scenes I’ll actually enjoy outside of these ones, and it feels like many action movies don’t bother with any of this.
I agree completely. Som many good movies spoiled by meaningless fights.
I am with you. I think it is a great deal harder to write direct and develop complex characters than to Sicily make an all action movie.
Ever seen the Kingsman? Pretty good action movies with really good fight scenes.
I feel similar about car chase sequences. There are occasionally creative or interesting moments in them but for the most part they are like you said, the outcome is certain and they feel like filler that for some reason every action movie needs to have.
They also rarely make sense, with high end sports cars struggling to outmaneuver big trucks, and motorcycles somehow managing to be any kind of threat to the main characters vehicle.
I don’t think any of these movies care at all about physics. They also have girls fighting as if they were twice their weight and power, kicking much bigger guys across the room. It’s silly.
Physical gender differences exist even in this crazy age of 2023 where people get upset for mentioning them.
I feel like Atomic Blonde did well to avoid this, but it’s been a while since I’ve seen it
Without that feeling that the hero may lose (which doesn’t exist in 99% of movies now), it’s just so boring to watch. Zzzz.
Agree on fight scenes. They are only interesting if they have uncertainty or show some clever and competent fighting. Any fight scene where the bad guy picks up his opponent and instead of strangling him to death just throw him a few meters away and goes “raah!” should just be edited out in its entirety.
Years ago I realized despite liking shows with lots of fights, often those were the parts I paid the least attention to. Think I like the genre because of the built-in breaks for my attention. But I’m also the type who was annoyed when my roommates paid for ad-free service on our livingroom TV because I preferred having them for the purpose of breaks.
Unless it’s Duel of the Fates of course
How about movies like Fast and the Furious where every single fight scene is ridiculous? They really don’t care about realism in those movies. I watch like 10 minutes and then I turn it off because it’s like watching a computer animation.
You are watching a computer animation. It’s all digital effects and animation. Hell even the actors are digitally recreated sometimes, making it fully digital effects
I stopped watching that after the first 2?
You would hate the movie “They Live” it has a comically long fight scene in it
At least that scene is funny and develops the plot. I think they’re talking more about stuff like all those 90s movies that have the plot grind to a halt so two characters can punch each other for ten minutes.
Possibly the greatest fight scene ever!
check the fight scenes in Kung Fu Hustle (Crazy Kung-Fu). I don’t like fight films so it was a challenge from a friend to watch this together. I ended up loving it.
Fight scenes in Everything Everywhere All at Once or Survive Style 5+ too were really fun.
Not to forget The Boys
The Boys has excellent fight scenes. Often they are used to develop the story as well.
Sometimes there is VICARIOUS pleasure to be had - I never noticed ‘schlorp schlorp’ noises.
There’s a lot of truth in the adage that ‘sex sells’. To imagine yourself being in the position of the person on screen is rather a guilty pleasure, enabling you to take part in ‘consentual sex’ with someone by simply imagining that you are the one doing the act.
I consider them part of normal human behavior and therefore natural in movies. If anything I might think more intimacy should be portrayed on screen. But this question and many of the replies let me see that I am not necessarily typical in my view that sex, love, and kissing are no big deal in media.
Going to the bathroom and sleeping are also normal human behavior, but I’m still not gonna watch a show or movie that shows someone spending 10 minutes on the toilet. Not because I think its gross , but just boring imo. But given I consider myself aroace-spec, I don’t expect my experience to necessarily be representative. And I think those things should be considered more normal in every-day life, rather than something that needs to be hidden, so normalizing it in media is probably a step forward.
10 minutes on the toilet? Did they forget their phone? LoL
What are you doing with your phone that speeds up your pooping? O.o
I think they mean it slows them down even more.
Since you mentioned “boring” — Probably the most out of step thing about me is that I think boredom is healthy. I think constantly stimulating stories (and consumption habits, relationships, news…) are interfering with the hard, slow work of sustainable existence. (I just realized I’m almost quoting Dr. Wong! Sorry lol)
I crave entertainment and distraction. And I admit my huge flaw of falling into a lecturing tone. Sigh. I don’t mean it. I only want to control me. It’s just that for most of my life I’ve been pretty unhappy and dysfunctional & I see links between my past state and a desire for escape and constant entertainment. Is this still about kissing in movies? Maybe. We are just sharing opinions on the internet. Getting feelings out is good.
Gonna go watch Andy Warhol’s “Sleep” now…