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A casual community for people with ADHD
Values:
Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.
Rules:
- No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
- No porn, gore, spam, or advertisements allowed.
- Do not request for donations.
- Do not link to other social media or paywalled content.
- Do not gatekeep or diagnose.
- Mark NSFW content accordingly.
- No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
- Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
- Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
- Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).
Encouraged:
- Funny memes.
- Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
- Questions on confusing situations.
- Seeking and sharing support.
- Engagement in our values.
Relevant Lemmy communities:
lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.
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Double speed audio.
I have real difficulty with listening to people speaking slowly. By the time they finish the sentence I have lost the start, so unless I actively hold their sentence until it is done I often lose meaning or misunderstand.
Listening at double speed allows me to keep up without losing what was said. I listen to audiobooks and podcasts while doing most chores and it has been a game changer.
For me, it’s also putting something into my calendar (specific time) or to-do list (no specific deadline – this is mostly for shopping and a second one for ideas). After that, if I think of something I try to do it right then if I can complete it or make measurable progress against it to avoid procrastination. Finally, physically putting things in places I can’t ignore so I don’t forget them (or a post-it in place, but that’s more risky).
I will set things I need to bring with me right in front of the door so I cannot leave without picking them up
Yep. It only becomes a post-it if it’s dangerous or needs to stay in the freezer until leaving or something
So true. There’s a post-it on my car key right now because I need to remember something in the fridge when I leave for work
Amphetamines
I’m in France and we still don’t have amphetamines. We have methylphenidate.
I wish we had better :(
Noise canceling headphones and white/background noise or music. Rather than true “white noise” I prefer deeper stuff like cosmic or other low wavelength noise.
I use this a lot. Usually rain spunds, but when I’m feeling spry I also like video game sound tracks and atmospheric black metal.
Where do you find “cosmic noise”?
Youtube. I used to have a front end that would allow the phone to lock while playing but that broke so I just raw dog it now.
For anyone who doesn’t know, Mynoise has tons of free soundscapes of all kinds, they’re all customizable with sliders with different sound tracks, and the different sound tracks never terminate at the same time, so there’s never a jarring loop. And there’s even more if you donate any amount, even just one time.
I do what I call “productive procrastination”.
I allow myself to procrastinate by doing something else instead that’s also necessary to do.
Of course, “necessary” is a slippery term.
But what definitely doesn’t fall under it is doom-scrolling, day-drinking and wikipedia rabbit holes.
This actually lets me be pretty productive throughout the day, as long as I have tasks I can push back endlessly.
Like, I haven’t brought my finances and investments in proper order in over 10 years.
Which probably cost me a 5-digit amount in lost profit over that time frame.
But I’m fortunate enough to not feel it and accept things like this as my ADHD tax.
It would take a couple hours, but would involve decisions and it never becomes urgent.
yes this is the way!
Myself, my wife and all 3 kids have adhd. Shared Google calendars are mandatory.
Does methylphenidate count as a life hack?
If I think of something I need, I usually just order it on Amazon prime right then, that way I don’t forget latter and accidentally run out of garbage bags or something.
Careful with that. You might get put on a list.
I remember in the 90s I had a system. You know those yellow sticky notes? Well I kept some in my bookbag for school. If I needed something, I wrote them down, and then on the weekend I’d put the sticky note on my door so I’d remember what I needed to grab from walmart.
Each of these items had COMPLETELY unrelated reasons that I was buying them. I wrote them down on unrelated days. At completely different times. With zero thought connecting them. However, I realized as I stepped in line what I had just done. I abandoned my cart entirely, and just LEFT.
I didn’t go back to that walmart for 3 years.
As I stood in line, with items in my cart, I realized I was about to buy:
1 box of 36 gallon trash bags
1 pack of sharpie markers
1 pair of scissors
1 container of draino
2 gallons of bleach
1 gardening shovel (the little ones that are 6 inches and a handle)
1 coloring book aimed at preschool children
1 jar of glitter
3 bottles of elmers glue
1 jug of orange juice
36 hersheys cookies & cream candy bars
1 pack of 3 pairs of dishwashing gloves
1 box of 10 condoms
1 box of cheerios
I saw that, and thought "holy shit! This looks like I’m about to have some kind of cult ritual sex, kill them, clean up the scene, bury the body, and then have breakfast!
Lol.
And if they’re very, very lucky, you’ll do it in that order.
Loud, energizing music will calm you by feeding a steady stream of dopamine.
Sadly this is also why I can fall asleep at a party after a coffee.
Being accountable to someone. Also my least favorite ADHD lifehack.
most effective answer, and therefore the one i most avoid
For me, those are deadlines. Nothing better.
I feel personally attacked.
The part of my brain that needs to be interested in something to do it is actually very stupid and easily tricked. Sometimes when I’m stuck all I have to do is literally pretend I find the work engaging.
Related, there’s some evidence that forcing a smile can improve one’s mood.
So empty….
If you really like doing something such as watching a new episode of your series on YouTube, but hate something else like exercising, combine the two. Only watch that series, while exercising. Then you’ll start looking forward to the exercise because you get to watch your series.
This is how I do laundry. My washer and dryer both conveniently take ~55 minutes to run a cycle, which also happens to be almost the exact runtime of most hour-long shows. Or like three episodes of a 24 minute show. So I combine the two; I watch TV while doing laundry.
Episode gets done? Check the dryer to see if it’s done. That way the clothes don’t just sit there for hours and wrinkle. Get all the loads done and out of the dryer, and laid flat on my couch and ottoman. Then I’ll take an episode or two to just throw hangers on everything. Get it all nicely sorted how it’s going to go in the closet. Then focus on socks and underwear, which have accumulated in a pile. Once everything is completely done and sorted, putting it away takes no time at all. And it doesn’t feel as much like a chore, because I’m just watching TV while doing it. And the important part is that I use the episodes as a timer, not as a distraction.
This is how I do laundry. My washer and dryer both conveniently take ~55 minutes to run a cycle, which also happens to be almost the exact runtime of most hour-long shows. Or like three episodes of a 24 minute show. So I combine the two; I watch TV while doing laundry.
Episode gets done? Check the dryer to see if it’s done. That way the clothes don’t just sit there for hours and wrinkle. Get all the loads done and out of the dryer, and laid flat on my couch and ottoman. Then I’ll take an episode or two to just throw hangers on everything. Get it all nicely sorted how it’s going to go in the closet. Then focus on socks and underwear, which have accumulated in a pile. Once everything is completely done and sorted, putting it away takes no time at all. And it doesn’t feel as much like a chore, because I’m just watching TV while doing it.
That’s actually genius. Imma try that.
This strategy is known as “temptation bundling.” It’s a thing. Amusingly, I learned about this because I was doing it (mowing the lawn + my favorite podcast.)
https://characterlab.org/tips-of-the-week/temptation-bundling/
Reading, thank you. Always down for a podcast rec too!
I learned about it on No Stupid Questions, a podcast by Stephen Dubner, the guy behind Freakonomics, and Angela Duckworth, who wrote “Grit.” I linked to Character Lab, which is/was a nonprofit by Duckworth and others at UPenn.
Katy Milkman, who coined the term temptation bundling, is a behavioral economist at Penn and often collaborates with Angela Duckworth. I also recommend Milkman’s recent book: “How to Change.”
Thank you!
Lists. My notes app puts in work. I make lists for everything. I set alarms for everything. I write things down while I’m thinking about them because I will forget. I ask for things in writing because I will misremember what was said. I have a white board stuck to my fridge so that I can write down when we’re out of something or running low. Oh. And basketball nets over the hamper.
I mainly struggle with the executive dysfunction part. I found that preparing anything at all helps, even just opening the document I need to write on another screen will mean that whenever my attention next detaches from whatever else I’m doing, I will automatically latch onto what I’m supposed to do as the next thing.
This is the only way I managed to make progress on my bachelor’s thesis.
Ok but this is so smart! I’m gonna try this.
I have a job working with teams to improve processes. I think a lot about waste and efficiencies, what end users will actually do or adopt, making things easier / faster, etc. Now I think about these things all the time in daily life, apply them to my ADHD, and iterate endlessly:
Also, radical acceptance of the things that are limiters.
Hot damn do I love gloves. I bought a 5000-count case five years ago and I’m just about out of them. Turns out making it easier to touch icky things like the sink strainer was well worth the $50.
Don’t punish yourself for not succeding in something, punish yourself for not putting the effort
What if I’m not successful in putting in the effort?
Doesn’t matter, try as hard as you can even if you are procrastinating, try to stop and do something, it’s hard for normal people and even harder for us